Saturday, August 16, 2014

My Friend Doug Died Yesterday



YEP Doug was exactly this cool.



This has become too common of a blog for me to write this year. It's gonna take me awhile to process this one. I never thought my time of yelling at people to get the fuck out of the way when we were going through a crowd was going to end.

 Doug was always on my side, even when others were against me. As much as hospitals bothered him, never once did he hesitate to come and visit me multiple times when I was there. He had the biggest heart.  He had such intelligence and a great wit.  He valued all of his friends equally, no matter what sexual orientation, religious faith, able bodied or disabled.  Doug was everyone’s friend.

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Doug was loyal and dedicated to everything he did, he was a volunteer at the LGBT Center, working behind the front desk, volunteering for Guys, Games, and Grub.  He was involved with various disability groups, and the Little People of America. He was a writer and editor for a mobility magazine for a while.  Most recently he was an author.

 Oh and also Doug was disabled, confined to a wheelchair, but you would never know it because Doug saw no boundaries.  He lived independently, he never expected special treatment and would get himself to where he wanted to go.  He disliked when people would call him an inspiration or tell him how great he was just because he looked a little different and was in a wheelchair.  He felt as normal as everybody else.  On our various outings at times we would encounter a restaurant or place of business that was not ADA compliant.  I usually got more pissed off than Doug did.  He wasn’t one of those people that went around threatening or suing businesses because of their ignorance of ADA Laws.  Usually a well written letter with a sharp tone to it was his way to address the situation

Doug was a lover of music.  Live music, he would wheel himself into the smallest most crowded venues to hear a punk rock band play. Wheeling his chair back and forth, and side to side dancing to the music.  He would go to the neighborhood bars in Hillcrest and wheel right  into the bar, whether it was in the middle of a group of guys or the middle of the dance floor and do his thing, and sometimes his “thing” included a little touchy feely with the boys.  No one ever seemed to mind. That’s how much Doug was loved.  Doug was one of the best wingmen I have ever had, He would reel them in and I would get his leftovers. 

Doug was surrounded by a couple dozen friends for his 50th birthday the night he had a minor accident that resulted in needing a medical procedure that required anesthesia .  He held on for a few days, but then his body just gave out as a result of complications from the procedure.

He had just completed writing a novel that will be published with the help of his friends and family so his legacy can live on through his writing.

The tributes to Doug on Facebook were endless; many people were posting photos raising a glass toasting Doug on Friday night.

There will never be another like Doug. He was a once in a lifetime kind of friend, he taught me so much.  Acceptance, tolerance, sensitivity, and a new way to see things… Oh and by the way for those of you that think Doug was at the perfect level for crotch viewing.  Yeah, he wasn’t a fan of that, because there’s the flip side to the crotch, having everyone’s ass in your face.

So what else is there to say except CHEERS Doug, I cant even express how much I will miss you!






Pride 2014





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